Week 2 September 9th
Week two is here and I am entrenched on the couch for a full day of football. Flytrap..aka Hampster Balls...aka tall Midget tried to convince me to go the Air Force Tennessee game and it crossed my mind for about 10 seconds. Hearing him, and the stories about him on Monday morning made me very glad I stayed home....more on this later. (I actually only left the house for a total of 4 hours all weekend and it was fantastic.) The early games weren't particularly great however, given the gambling implications they have I am certainly intrigued. Other than actually collecting money this is the single best part of gambling…..making ordinary games like Rutgers vs. Illinois, Lousiville vs. Temple and UNC vs. Virginia Tech meaningful.
The first thing I noticed is that everyone I mean everyone in the LYA and LYA Two must have been watching practice at Auburn and Virginia Tech this week. A simple rule is that anytime everyone loves one game you should take all of your money and go the other way. This week’s overwhelming picks are Va Tech -12.5 and Auburn -20….there is no way both will cover.
My picks for the week are shaky at best:
Indiana -3.5 over Ball St -loss
Texas A&M -21.5 over LA Lafayette -win
Bowling Green -21.5 over Buffalo -loss
UNLV +14.5 over Iowa St. -win
Auburn -20 over Miss St. -win
Kansas St -21 over Florida Atlantic -win
However, the games I feel best about are Rutgers -11.5 and Stanford -9.5. Why I didn’t pick these in my pools I will never know. This is what happens when you choke in gambling….you love a game all week and then when it comes time to pull the trigger you second guess yourself. I will have to get some side action on these games.
I would say over the day I would watch all or part of at least 10 college games and here is what I noticed:
- Tennessee, Florida and Auburn fans beware. Georgia is much better off with Matthew Stafford as their QB. This kid is a playmaker and has more talent in his left pinky than Joe T. does. With Georgia’s 3 headed running game they desperately needed someone who could keep the defense honest…..he will do that and much more. Too bad for Calvin Johnson he isn’t at GA Tech.
- Sticking with the SEC. Steve Spurrier must have stomach ulcers. Did you see the look on his face during the Georgia game as his offense gave away scoring chance after scoring chance. Never before I have I watched a Spurrier team knowing that they were doomed.
- Rutgers is good. (They easily cover the 11.5 points and win 33-0) I know it was Illinois but this team believes. Watch out West Virginia….now you might have to play 4 games this year.
- Say what you want about Miami and FSU. These are not great football teams. I listened to ESPN go on and on about how awesome each team was on defense hence the lack of offense. I didn’t believe it last Monday and I certainly don’t believe it after Troy almost beat the mighty Noles.
- Where does Ohio St. find these great white linebackers? Spielman, Katzenmoyer, Carpenter, Hawk and now Laurinaitis. Athletic, a nose for the ball and always in the right place at the right time.
- Virginia Tech once again has great special teams and defense but is really lacking much of an offense. North Carolina literally handed them the ball 4 times. By the way they covered and so did Auburn…something is really wrong.
- Colt McCoy (much like Joe T.) is simply a placeholder for the next Texas QB.
- Ron Zook should call Bob Davie and find out how he can get into broadcasting. He should be perfect apparently they don’t require any talent to be on TV.
Teams of the week:
OSU – Clearly #1 after the win in Austin. We all know about Ted Ginn Jr., but look out for Anthony Gonzalez
ND - Defense got too much blame last year and too much credit this year. One thing you can say is they are very opportunistic and have 2 great playmaking safeties.
New Hampshire – beat Northwestern. If you didn’t read about their QB Santos and WR Ball (about to break Jerry Rice’s TD records) in the USA Today last week these guys can play.
Air Force/Flytrap – This is really more about Flytrap watching his alma-mater Air Force than it is about his Falcons losing 31-30 at Tennessee after a failed 2 point conversion. If only Flytrap actually could remember what happened to him or the Force. He called me for a halftime line and could barely speak. Quoting Whitey after the game “I have never seen him that drunk he was drinking vodka straight from the bottle.”
Keep in Mind the content below has been censored:
4 hours before the game Flytrap was pantsed at the tailgate in front more than 20 people. Of course most people wear underwear, not Pine.
Later in the night Flytrap celebrated the Force's performance:
a) by hitting Whitey about the face, back, neck and head 17 times in the first half
b) repeatedly verbally accosting the 3 ladies sitting in front of him the youngest of whom was 68 c) took the old man's pulse sitting next to him d) Screamed multiple F bombs while the 5 and 8 yr old in front of him asked their grandmother what the mad drunk guy was saying
e) Drank 10 oz’s of Vodka straight from the water bottle. That’s the same Vodka he was supposed to team drink in the Sprite Whitey bought them.
f) Hit, grabbed and yanked TW 3 more times in the 2nd half before he told Flytrap that he was going to beat the hell out of him if he touched him again
g) Made the Golden Girls and their granddaughters leave the game because they couldn’t take sitting close to him anymore
h) Slapped TW for the last time which in turn caused TW to punch Flytrap as hard as he could and break his wrist
i) Passed out in TW's car on the way to Brody’s pouring 20 oz. of water on his crotch and into the seat of TW's car j) which led to him asking TW yesterday morning “Whitey, Did I piss myself last night?”
No wonder he feels still feels badly on Monday.
Disappointments:
Texas – 7 points at home with those 2 running backs? Get ready for Jevan Snead.
Penn State – 41-3 mid-way through the 4th quarter.
Iowa – I know Drew Tate didn’t play, but come on it is Syracuse.
Arizona – Mike Stoops still has a long way to go. 45 -3 losers at LSU….yikes.
FSU – When will Bobby let someone other than his son run the offense?
Stanford – My lock of the year looked great in the 2nd quarter with the Cardinal up 20. Final: San Jose St. 35 – Stanford 34. Me - Minus $100.
Next week early predictions:
Florida over Tennessee
Auburn barely over LSU
USC over Nebraska
Clemson over FSU
Louisville over Miami
Oregon over Oklahoma
NFL Notes:
-Got to love Tiki Barber and Warrick Dunn as both had big games.
-The Colts will not get to the Super Bowl without a running game. (Laurence Maroney would have looked good in this offense)
-If Carson Palmer stays healthy the Bengals are going to the Super Bowl.
-Reggie Bush is good….the Saints will not be pushovers with him, Duece and Drew Brees. (By the way Mario Williams had 2 tackles and Houston’s leading rusher was Wali Lundy with 32 yards and they lost again.) And where is the Houston GM….hmmm he left. This will prove to be one of the biggest blunders in the history of the NFL draft
-While a win over the 49ers does not prove much, the Arizona Cardinals do have a pulse and lethal offense. Warner found 7 different receivers for 301 yards including Larry Fitzgerald 9 times for 133.
-Jake Plummer with 3 interceptions against the Rams picks up where he left off last January, a loser.
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